If you follow my Insta (which if you don’t, you really should SamhiC8LovesToWrite), then you would’ve seen the above images with the following caption:
So, as promised, here’s the context: My old high school has this pageant thing that they call “Mr. [Insert School Name Here]”. It’s fun. A bunch of teenage guys dress up in funny costumes, perform their talents, and they do a different theme every ear. There are twelve contestants and they’re each given a month to go by: Mr. January, Mr. February, Mr… you get the point. The event is run by the Student Council and for the sake of advertising the event, they’ve been posting about it on their Instagram which I follow.
As I mention in the letter, half-jokingly, I wrote “Why is there no Miss [Insert School Name Here]? Or, better yet, a Gender Neutral one?” But it wasn’t a joke. It’s a legitimate question. Within minutes, there were at least three other people (who I can only assume are current or former students) who posted comments agreeing with the sentiment, one of whom even noted that it’s ironic as hell because the event that features men is hosted during Women’s History Month. And within minutes after that, the entire frickin’ comment thread was deleted. Not okay. Not frickin’ okay.
Half an hour later, I started drafting that letter.
You can consider it me going nuclear if you must. It probably it. Call it retaliation. Call it stupidity. Call it advocating for inclusivity and safer subliminal messaging from the school via their events. Call it whatever the hell you what. It’s probably all of the above and more depending on your perspective.
But here is what it is not: to be ignored.
There is no world in which it is warranted that that comment thread should’ve been deleted. And sure, I could’ve just commented the same thing again on the same post. But what would that accomplish? It would probably just get deleted again. Chances are whoever took down the thread didn’t even consider that they’d be violating my First Amendment rights of free speech and just didn’t want some controversial blow up on their Insta. Which is fine. I get it.
But life is about controversy and conversation.
If you can’t even say how you feel – good or bad – what’s the fucking point?
No one, fucking no one gets to shut down my voice.
You know, it’s funny, in the past people have told me about how they’re afraid to talk to me sometimes because they feel like I’m unapproachable. Here’s the thing: I’m not. You can tell me anything. But you best believe that after hearing you out, I will tell you right back exactly how I feel, good or bad. And if you can’t handle it, that’s not my fault. Provided that I am not targeting a specific person or verbally harassing them, I can say whatever the fuck I want and the world can listen. Agree with me, disagree with me, ignore me, I don’t care. But you do not censor me. You do not try to shut my voice down and prevent everyone else from hearing me out. That does not happen. That cannot happen. And if you try, you will fail.
Dear old high school Student Council, thus are the consequences of you taking down my comment thread. [Insert of devil face emoji.]
The funny part is, if you’d left it up, I would’ve forgotten about the whole thing by breakfast today and moved onto the next thing.
I am a listener. But I’m also a talker. And that is why I never have to complain about feeling like I’m unable to speak. Because at the end of the day, it is my decision and mine alone to decide what to say and when and how. To all those out there that feel like their voice is being shut down: just say what you want to say louder and louder and again and again.
I’m hearing Elizabeth Gillies in the background.
Anyone know this song:
One of my favorites.
The different between the speaker of that song and me however is I don’t think anyone knows me. Here’s the thing, Babes: no one ever knows you. They won’t know unless you tell them. Because who we are and what we want constantly change and constantly evolve and the only person who will every completely, truly know us is ourselves.
But that doesn’t mean we can’t try and understand each other.
And even that sometimes epically fails and it’s fine.
Here’s what’s not okay: Refusing to accept someone or let them speak because you don’t understand them.
