And the end of an era approaches.
Don’t worry, I ain’t talkin’ about this blog. MML will be continuing ’til I am no more.
I ain’t talkin’ about the universe either. As far as I can tell, the Earth and the Sun and everything under the Sun and all the other suns will be spinning for a long time to come.
I’m talking about my love life.
Every now and then, there’s this shift inside my mind and I realize that my obsessions are changing, what I want I want is changing, who I want is changing. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll be taking trips down memory lane whenever I feel like it, but the romances will be just that – memories. And new ones stories will run in the tangible realm of reality. Which actually allows me to write better about the past. It’s surprisingly refreshing to write about something after you’ve lived it, rather than while.
But that’s for another day.
For today?
Yesterday was a weird day… It started out with me feeling some kind of way. Numb. Bored. Not happy or sad or anything. Tired and lazy.
And there was no remedy. Not knowing my most recent ex forgives me for my choices or reconcilliation with the one that got away (which is so dramatic. Not a lover. A friend.) I mean, don’t get me wrong, it all gave me a feeling of heart content but I was still numb…
But a single call with my Bestest Friend cheered me right up.
Our almost-weekly phone calls are the best part of my week. Irrespective of how stressed I am, talking to her makes me feel like I’m on top of the world and “nobody can drag me down” (and yes, I’m totally quoting 1D’s “Drag Me Down” right now).
It was funny – at some point, I said “I wish I could find another you” and she said “No”. “No?” I asked and laughed. “No.” She told me how upset she’d be and how she’s be freaking out and would be worried about losing me. And I knew that if she tried to replace me, I’m be freaking out just the same. But I told her I wasn’t finished. I told her “I wish I found another you so that I could marry them.” She’s straight and so there’s no prospect of romance there but if I could find her clone and marry the clone I’d had her as both a best friend and my most epic lover.
She laughed and said not to worry and that if she can’t find anyone else, provided that I’m single as well (which let’s face it, at this rate, I probably will be), she’ll gladly marry me.
I told her we have some strange convos. Who has a marriage pact with someone they have no romantic feelings for and never will? We do. Because I’m me. She’s her. And we’re us.
I’ve been through some crazy love drama this past week and honestly, I thought that’s what today’s post would be about. But eff that. Because with her in my life, all the drama simply doesn’t stress me out as much. Instead, we laugh about it. And talk about how crazy they all are. Yes, they‘re the crazy ones.
And we’re awesome. And we’re thriving. And we’re lunatics. And we’re amazing.
